August 2, 12:38 am, still in Carbondale

Scooty is still with us. No sign of the meth skags.

Maybe it's the fact that it's past midnight and still 82 degrees, but I think I have figured out how to get rich.

You know Gnarls Barkley? They figured it out, too. Get a stupid name that's a mash-up of an already familiar name. Make a pop song. Get paid millions.

The problem is, I don't know which name to pick. I have three, and they all seem like winners. In no particular order, they are:

1) Hairy Chronic, Jr.
2) Johann Sebastian Bacharach
3) Gringo Starr

i'm thinking of going with #3, only because 1 and 2 are still up in the air (what's funnier - Hairy Chronic Doober or Hairy Chronic Jr. - Johann Sebastian Bacharach or Johann Sebastian Rock? see what I mean?)

Now all I need is an A&R guy. And a producer.

Also, does anyone out there play instruments, or write songs? I could use your help.

Holy Hubba bubba, it sure is hot.